The Journey Starts Here

Welcome to my odd sense of humor. Not always for the faint of heart.

Tuesday, January 11, 2011

Escaping the Femine Prison



It’s been a busy 8 days.  I know I haven’t done a regular post, unless it was a guest post, but as you should know, we had a friend of my wife’s in for a visit.  She has gone home, just in time to get pounded with snow.

But now that she is gone, I find myself somewhat relieved.  Yes, I like my wife’s friend and yes I enjoyed having her here.  However, there is something you must understand.  Having another woman in the house, who is your wife’s friend, seriously curtails your manhood.

I know that for all you women reading this, you will soon curl your lip, especially if you are married.  But being a man, is being a man, and there are things we do, as men, that we do.  I was unable to engage in my normal manly things since we had a quest.  In other words, I had to be on my BEST BEHAVIOUR.

Do you understand how difficult this is, as a man, to pull off?

I was unable to sneak downstairs in the middle of the night in my underwear to get something to drink.

I was unable to walk around the house, farting as I am used to doing, especially when I’m looking to disgust my wife and daughter and get a quick laugh out of it.

I was unable to burp out in the open, no matter where I was in the house.

I was unable to scratch my butt, or other parts of my anatomy, when I felt like it.

I was unable to take the remote, with my hand halfway down my pants like Al Bundy, and channel surf.

I could not do any of these things, in order not to embarrass my wife.  Hey, don’t judge me, she knows where I sleep and is a little overly fond of sharp objects.  It was like a PRISON.

But now?  Now I’m free.  Free to burp, fart, walk around in my underwear, channel surf, and generally do what I do best.  Be a man.

Freedom never felt so good.  Or maybe that was the loud obnoxious fart I just let out.

I have a number of comments and other things I will be taking care of over the next few days to get back into the swing of things.  I hope everyone is having a good week, and is not totally frozen.

Until next time, take care.

7 comments:

  1. You're such a good boy. Thank you baby, you know I love ya, not always what comes outta you, but you? Yeah.

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  2. Love it! What a great post, I will have to share this with my husband when he gets back!

    Anna, The Pilot's Wife

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  3. Glad you enjoyed, and believe me your husband will understand this post perfectly.

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  4. lol kevin you astound me my friend. of all the different things one could list about the responsibilities of being a 'man', and you go for fart jokes + body odor... good job donna, you successfully ran 85% of kevins man mojo into nonexistance. teach me how to do that? might be useful one day.

    anyawys, now that that's out of the way, we can move on into other, more painful subjects. such as finding myself agreeing with said man actions. DAMN YOU KEVIN. who was in town, FB friend?

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  5. Having guests does not stop Hubs. It slows him down but doesn't stop him. Maybe that's why I don't invite people to stay over? LOL

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  6. ROFLMAO! You're disgusting! :P Seriously men are disgusting!! XD

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